We wish to thank you for your interest in our program. In applying to become a Volunteer Mentor, you have shown a willingness to invest part of your life in a child whose life will be enriched by your continuing friendship, guidance and support. In return, we believe it can be a means of much pleasure, learning and satisfaction for you.

Why The Screening Process?

One of the most difficult aspects of Big Brothers work is that of screening the applicants. While most people adequately meet the requirements necessary for acceptance as an active volunteer mentor, some will not. The screening process is a time for you to assess whether Big Brothers work will be a positive experience for you at this point in time. If you are not accepted, this does not mean that you are thought any less of as a person. It merley means that at this point in time you do not meet the requirements of health, character or personality which have been established as agency policy. These guidelines are reviewed from time to time by Big Brothers Big Sisters of Canada and may be discussed with the Social Worker. All of these considerations and others that might suggest themselves as well show the necessity of a thorough study of each applicant. In order to do this, each applicant is required to complete an Application Package which includes an application form, a criminal reference check, a medical clearance and four personal references. Each applicant also participates in an orientation interview and an assessment/screening interview. Then an evaluation of the applicant is completed to determine his/her suitability and to help us to match the volunteer, if accepted, to a Little Brother. All the information collected is held in strict confidence and each applicant is given individual consideration. The Social Worker' has the task of selecting the applicants who fulfill the requirements for successful Big Brother work. It is a great responsibility and we do not discharge it lightly. Keeping in mind that our primary purpose is to provide mature adult friendship and guidance for boys from father-absent homes, we can realize that the above proceedure is both valid and necessary. This means that some applicants who want to volunteer will not be accepted, but would you want it any other way?

What is a Big Brother?

As you contemplate this relationship we felt it important to share some thoughts with you and set some guidelines aimed at equipping you to do the best possible job with your Little Brother. It is important to remember that if you are chosen, it is only after careful consideration by our agency. We felt that you have the qualities and ingredients to contribute in a meaningful way to a young boy's life. If, at times, you feel apprehensive about your abilities to handle this important task please remember we are not asking for experienced child psychologists, but for you as a unique individual who shows warmth, caring, and interest in our program. This is a voluntary relationship void of the usual fears and anxieties associated with authoritative agencies that makes possible the development of a special friendship. Supporting each Big Brother volunteer is a professional social worker trained in human behaviour and is aware of the facilities in the community which can assist the Little Brother and his family to realize their maximum potential. You are not abandoned in your work, you become part of a team working in the best interest of one particular boy. We ask you to be a man who remembers what it is like to be a boy. To be able to put yourself in his place, to have this magic we call "empathy." You influence him to change because he knows you understand the difficulties he faces growing up.

What Are You To Your Little Brother?

To your Little Brother you are a person who has no "strings attached." You hope he will grow and mature into a responsible adult, but you make no demands upon him as others do. You just want him to have a good time. But in having fun, you help weaken his defenses. Fun has a function. Some boys come out of a a situation were there is a scarcity of gratification and fun. For others a strained home environment hinders normal enjoyments. The Volunteer provides these experiences that the boys needs to have. Patience in a prime requisite for any volunteer. It takes time to gain a boy's confidence and trust. This can be facilitated by accepting the boy for who he is and how he is. Let him know that ou had growing pains similar to his when you were young. Have faith that your honest and sincere example will have a positive impact on him. Your Little Brother will have a genuine appreciation of those who know how to lead without ordering or scolding. Be kind by firm. Be reasonable and realistic in your expectations.

What Are The Rewards?

Your rewards in this relationship can be numerous if you know where to find them. the Volunteer see things in his Little Brother that others don't always get a chance to see.  The first time he shares a problem with you or makes that first phone call to you (this can take months to happen). Whe he can tell you how poorly he did on a math test. When he reaches up to touch your chin to see if you shaved today and you know that he is asking for that needed male attention.  When you can be together without needing to talk, just enjoying each other's company.  When you can share a disapointment in each other and later feel the closeness that learning about each other brings.  when you phone him and he can tell you he is busy tonight and you can enjoy his first steps towards independence.  These are just a few of the many rewards that being a Big Brother can bring.

There is no greater satisfaction than that which comes from helpiing a youngster over the roiugh spots and on to a happy, useful and sucessful way of life.  Showering him with gifts and attention is far less desirable than just being a "good listener" and "a friend to do things with."  It is wise to make the boy think that being a Little Brother is something special - and it is!

What About Wives/Partners?

As you consider this step to become a Volunteer, we would like to include a word to your parnter. We welcome you as part of our friendship team. Behind every married Big Brother a partner's support and co-operation is a true asset. We ask that every partner give serious consideration to the matter of her partner becoming invovled with a Little Brother. We realize that time will be spent by your partner away from the home and family, however, in making a welcoming place for the Little Brother and including him in some family activities and encouraging your partner in his endeavors, we feel sure you will view this relationship as a privilege and a pleasure and not as an obligation.

What Is The Social Worker's Role?

The course of any close relationship does not always run smoothly. We ask you not to hesitate to contact your Social Worker if you have any concerns. Problems are always best dealt with when they are small. When problems arise, endeavor to get results through kindness, never through fear. Use your Social Worker for consultation and coaching whenever indicated.

What About The Little Brother's Mother?

We encourage Volunteers to get acquainted with the boy''s mother. Our hope is that you will feel omfortable with each other, openly sharing information concerning your Little Brother. As your relationship develops it is important that mom knows and trusts the person who is helping fill a void in her son's life. We suggest you take time out to chat occasionally. By getting to know each other you will both reap the benefits of the time invested. In summary, we ask you to be yourself, relax and enjoy what can truly be a fun and rewarding relationship!