Excerpts from Big Brother by Hadielia Yassiri
Henry Heideman has been a Big Brother to four Little Brothers during the past 32 years.
Heideman says he became a Big Brother because it is an undemanding way to fulfill his belief in community involvement.
"Its easy. I always thought that every person owes something to the community that he or she lives in, and being naturally lazy, I couldn't think of anything easier than being a Big Brother"
"Sometimes we just hang out together and do ordinary stuff like shopping, going to the movies, bike riding or watching TV" says Heideman. "Simple activities have the greatest impact on a child because he can see how you handle interactions with other people and how you deal with life. It is easy to set an example when you are on familiar turf"
He sees his role as a friend and a male role model to his Little Bothers. "The best way I found to accomplish this is to set an example, be myself and to be there when needed"
Heideman has kept in contact with two of his former Little Brothers. The third moved out of the province. "Its not possible to have a long-term relationship with a boy and not become emotionally involved with him and his family. All four of my Littles became members of my family. My children still want to include my former Littles in family activities and even my grandchildren know my Littles' families."
"I hope that I have passed a few things onto my Littles, honesty and a sense of fair play being chief among them. In return, they have taught me patience and given me that warm glow that you get when you feel appreciated."
Heideman wants to continue his involvement with Big Brothers. "Being with a kid lets me be a kid again. The need for Big Brothers is there. Even though at my age, I feel a youth deserves a younger Big Brother than me, perhaps I am better than no Big Brother at all."
Heideman urges anyone who has thought of becoming a Big Brother to give it a try. "You'll love it! Please think of becoming a Big Brother. There are far too many boys on the waiting lists."
Other Testimonials
“I’ve learned how important I can be to a child and it’s kind of shocking! But it feels so good - the school tells me how Ashley’s practically bouncing with excitement waiting for me. Believe me, it’s wonderful for my self esteem too. I have total support from my workplace, which is great. I’m apt to give everything I’ve got to my job but this gives me time for something that means a lot to me, something that provides balance in my life.”
Lorena, In-School Mentor
“Ashley has a lot of energy and it takes a lot of energy to keep up with her and sometimes that’s hard when I’m juggling three jobs. Since her Big Sister Lorena came along she’s calmer and she’s allowed me to get closer to her. Our relationship’s gotten much stronger.”
Michelle, Parent
“If you haven’t been a Little Brother it’s really hard to explain adequately how one person can have such a huge impact on your life. I had my Big Brother for 3 years before he moved away - I like to think he’d be pleased that I’ve just been accepted to Med School. Now, as an adult, I have a really busy schedule, but I received such a benefit from my Big Brother that it’s important for me to be a volunteer. The In-School Mentoring Program is perfect for me. My Mentee is so much like I was - too much energy, short attention span. I really understand his frustration. We try to do things that are a bit different. Last week we made nanaimo bars which made him very popular with his teachers. We get closer every day - it’s an amazing experience.”
Chad, In-School Mentor & former Little Brother
“Being part of BigBunch is a great release from school responsibilities. I’ve really learned a lot about problem solving and leadership from our Group Mentors and I get a great feeling doing something for someone else. We do things my Little Brother Bruce doesn’t get much chance to do. He’s shy and this really helps him.”
Jacob, BigBunch Member, Grade XII student
“Steven took to Craig & Linda (Big Couple) right away...which is unusual for him. Steven has never had a man in his life. Craig and he share a lot of interests and since they’ve been matched Steven is trying new things with them. Steven’s self confidence has grown too. What might seem like a small benefit to most but is a huge benefit for me is seeing the happy faces my kids have after being out with their Bigs.”
Bev, Parent
“When I received you as a Big Sister I realized how lucky I was but I never told you. You helped me through the worst days of my life and shared the good days with me. You are my best friend and that will never leave my heart.”
Little Sister, Angela in what she describes
as a “long overdue thank you”, 11 years after
being matched with her Big Sister, Annette
“I am writing to thank you and everyone else for getting me a Big Brother, Mark. We have lots of fun together. We have gone fishing, I’ve seen some airplanes with him, we went to the park and the beach. Mark even came to my spring concert. I was Papa Bear.”
Little Brother, David
“Big Brothers Big Sisters gave me the learning experience of a lifetime. They invited me to a conference in Ottawa concerning youth at risk. This gave me the opportunity to learn something about myself that I didn’t really know. It brought up my self-confidence and self-esteem and desire to succeed. I was impressed by some of the programs other people were talking about. I think programs should enhance young people’s self-esteem, giving them responsibility and trusting them to make their own judgements. It’s like Big Brothers Big Sisters - it’s better to prevent problems than to fix them later.”
Angela, former Little Sister, delegate to Youth Partnership, Youth at Risk (1999)
“My father died when I was about 8 years old. I knew I missed something special. I’m retired now and have some time so I think it’s my responsibility to be a decent role model to a child. It costs nothing but a bit of time - and it’s lots of fun!”
Alston, In-School Mentor
“Dear Big Brothers Big Sisters,
I really love my Big Sister, she is just what I always wanted in a friend that I could call my own. She means the world to me. I want to “Thank You” for giving me such a wonderful Big Sister.”
Little Sister, Angela
“I feel really special because my Big Brother and Big Sister accept me into their home. Yes, that makes me feel really special.”
Luke, Little Brother matched to a Big Couple